Happy Wednesday. Misc. Stuff.
Hiya. It’s hard to think of things to post about when you’re distracted with big stuff you can’t post about. But I am. And no, I’m not sharing, at least not for now. And I’ve been pretty busy. Still…I found time to check through all my stats. WordPress has some new stats plugins that are simply amazing. Wassup and Counterize II are two good ones, there’s another more complex mapping stats program I’m messing with but it’s not working yet. Counterize lets you look at the IP locations of your users.
So it seems I’m a big hit in the middle east. Honestly! I had no idea, but apparently ‘cuckold’ is a popular search term….and several visitors have ended up here from various faraway lands. So howdy and a big wet kiss from Texas to the Republic of Muldova, Greece, Saudi Arabia, Iran, Japan, Israel and Jordan…and yes, to you too Germany, Canada, France, Belgium, and all the northern and midwestern states. But to the first group- I see your hits and wonder how you got here and what you think. Feel free to comment…Should I add a translator plugin?
And -at least today, I’m hit #1 on google blogsearch for the term “Cuckold”. Wow. Really? I had to check, and yep. So, where are all these cuckies, anyway? I’d love to hear from some. I need some adoration from men who will never have me. 
 That’s always such an upper. But this will do in a pinch. I’ll try and post some more for you guys.
I decided to stop posting my monthly stats because of some referrer spammers who found me. Kinda funny though, google reduces your page rank for linking to adult sites, so I just laugh at them. And hack around with my .htaccess. Besides, it gets kinda creepy some months. I think that just encourages them.
I found a great online store with fabulous man panties, some really great stuff. Kudos to Bodyaware for a great product line. And their sister store, XDress, has some pretty hot lingerie made for men’s bodies, like this garter set I think I am going to have to buy, just to have on hand for you know- whoever. I am really impressed, and it’s very tastefully and tastily represented. I may share it with my gay stepdad and his partner. For sure, chance should go take a look. Cute skirts. They should make matching lingerie for women. That would be rather awesome in a twisted way. I’m not sure feminization of straight subs is their aim, but I really like the lingerie line. Wouldn’t it be sweet to match your Mistress??
My credit card company first made me call them to verify that I was indeed purchasing panties from a gay man’s underwear site. Actually, not panties, and the site isn’t overtly gay, except that it’s men in panties. I bought a hot leather chastisty belt for when I want to look at it in something yummy. CBT#000’s are hot but in a different way. This is just eye candy for me. And on sale. I hope it arrives soon. I’m also going to have to save for this one before the sale is over…Very Nice. I am going to have to go shower now.
Note to Self: create email footer with site link immediately. Almost immediately.
Well, my V day plans didn’t happen yesterday either. Too cold, dangerous storms. I had dinner at sparky’s and had to come home to get some work done overnight. We talked a bit, and I learned a bit more about sparky’s personality, at least relationship wise. After dinner we snuggled on the couch, he gave me a foot massage and licked my feet, before I directed him to the bedroom and had a long lesson on how I like to be serviced orally and a long lovemaking session, during which I discussed with him some plans I had for him such as Naked Handy-Girl Saturday (more on that later). It was a nice night, nothing groundbreaking. (Well, that’s not true, I had a lot of big internal stuff going on, but I just don’t feel like revealing any of it at this point). Except, that sparky revealed he didn’t know about my blog, just as I was leaving. Which is silly, since he communicates with me via the email on my contact page, and I told him about it when we met, and have mentioned it several times- I did ask if he minded about the photos, as well. That’s what I get for being so lazy and not putting my site info into my email footers like I meant to months ago. So, this presents me with a dilemma. He asked what the address was last night and I told him I thought I’d wait a bit longer before sharing it with him. The thought of getting into it all as I was standing there with my bag on my shoulder and my keys in hand was just a little too much. It’s time for an uncomfortable conversation, and I probably should have had it with him right then.
He clearly doesn’t know about p. or my internal debate about that, or my lack of spark with him….any of what I’ve written about him here. I wasn’t totally sure he was reading or not because of his personality and nervousness and way of communicating…he’s got a lot of walls up, and I haven’t probed at many of them because of the lack of spark and not wanting to lead him on. Some people are blog readers, some are not…and we are both at two different speeds, tech wise. I google the hell out of anyone I meet, almost right away…it’s easy to forget not everyone has integrated the web into their personal lives as much as I have (which is far less than many I know). I guess I just assumed he was keeping up with it and trying to stick it out anyway. I want to just be as honest as possible about my feelings for him and where I see him fitting into my life right now; but also be as sensitive to his emotional nature, responsible with his heart as I can be. That’s going to take some work. And until I do it, I won’t be posting much about what has been going on in my own heart and head about the men in my life, including him. Those aren’t things I want sparky to read before we talk in person. So I have to find time to set aside to do that, this week….with a long hard work week ahead of me too. I’ll try and find other things to post about in the meantime.
sparky saves the day
Yesterday just didn’t turn out the way I planned, the whole day. But I have to say that it really didn’t matter. I had a grand time….thanks to sparky who had it all together when I simply did not.
Tardy Tailspin
My insomnia has been bad lately. So Wednesday night when I was tired at 9:30 pm, I went with it, and went to bed. And, woke up at 2 am bright eyed and bushy tailed, as my family might say. No biggie. I worked. Figured I’d sleep after taking C. to school until about lunchtime, giving me plenty of time to get ready for my V.day date with sparky. So, 6:50, we left the house, got about halfway there….remembered it was a late start day- no school until 10 am. No sleep until after 10 am. Got home at 10:30, and the phone began to ring. And ring. And ring. One call was sparky; more on that next. Anyhoo, it was 3 pm by the time I got to bed. And had to pick up C. at 6:40, with sparky picking me up for the 8 pm ballet at 7. A tight schedule. I set my alarm for 5pm. I woke up at 6:35, when a salesman rang my doorbell. 
I made the 20 minute drive to the school in 13. Still, sparky got to my place before I did, roses in hand, to see me in full bed head panic regalia, kid in tow, living room with laundry and dishes and mail all over…no helping any of that now. I rushed upstairs and into my dress, no time for good makeup or straightening my curly hair, just a quick up do and some lip gloss and mascara. Or for getting into power mode, or at least out of frantic mom mode. Or for putting my collar and short lead on sparky (the clip goes on my male’s waistband while we are out for easy access to a good tug when he needs it) and inserting his training plug as I’d planned. Which leads to the other way V.Day didn’t happen the way I meant it to.
Sometimes the element of surprise blows up in your face.
It’s totally my own fault. And, besides that, I had a fabulous time. I truly, truly did. But, spending the night at the ballet wasn’t at all what I really wanted to do last night with sparky. But, did I tell him what I wanted to do before he bought tickets like a smart woman? No. It wasn’t intentional. It was vanilla crowding my brain. Work and stress and C. and p. and the cat box and the brake job I can’t find time to go get and taxes and just thinking about filling out the FAFSA- not to mention doing it or thinking about what that means or how I’m going to pay for it. We’ve both been so busy. Sunday, the subject was the furthest from my mind. Tuesday he came for lunch and a quickie, and I was more concerned with finding time to also fit in a cropping, until he brought it up tentatively “Do you have plans Thursday?”…and it took me a minute to remember the date. I didn’t have any. We didn’t talk again until Wednesday night, both busy with work and kids. When I asked if he had anything planned, he mentioned the museum date we never got to, and I knew the museum would be closed but decided to let him figure that out and get back to me, by which time I would have a plan. And I did- you’ll hear about them later because I am carrying them out this weekend. But when he called, he had purchased ballet tickets instead, remembering I’d mentioned loving to dance, my 13 years of ballet lessons, and my love of the theater. So clearly, I wasn’t at all unhappy with the choice he made, it was a lovely date and a thoughtful plan and told me a lot about him both as a person and as a slave/boyfriend. I just didn’t feel like going downtown, hassling with parking and people; I was stressed and tired and had planned a much more private and kinky evening…and I wanted to surprise him. He said he hadn’t made reservations anywhere, and in my experience, that ends up as a V.Day at IHOP in Austin. So I thought I might be able to fit a portion of my plans into the mix, at any rate.
Ballet Idol
We enjoyed the presentation, which was a competition between three new up and coming choreographers who had each been given the same dancers and resources (and only 40 hours, wow) to choreograph a piece. The audience could vote via cell phone or ballot- ballet idol. And the works were amazing and added to the many recent tugs at my dancer’s heartstrings that have been popping up recently. Walking back to the car, we encountered some amazing wind. I’d worn a slinky red wrap dress and red strappy heels; slinky and wrap being two key words here. I’d also not worn panties. I don’t wear them often- but I usually will with a dress. But, I didn’t because the dress needed a slip- even a thong showed panty lines- and my only sexy slips are full body ones…aaand the dress, being a wrap thingie, was too low cut in the cleavage area to wear any of them with it. And more importantly, I had different plans for the evening. Anyway, sparky is over 6 feet tall. And I’m barely over 5 feet, even in heels. Walking uphill, crossing the street, with a wind gust of about 30 mph, I was kind of struggling to keep up, and keep wrapped, all while creating the illusion that I wasn’t struggling, or in pain from a blister, and was also totally in control of the day. Which clearly, I was not. He turned around at just the wring moment to say something about the wind not being in the forecast. “If I’d known I’d have worn panties”- I quipped back with a wink. It was possibly my best moment of the night.
We went to a restaurant after, sparky had found one that wasn’t packed, and enjoyed some conversation and wine. My entree was poor, but nothing I’d send it back for- I didn’t mind too much, the wine was good and sparky finally relaxed enough to open up some, which I liked most. He was also pretty distracted from my feeling like a complete disaster by the lack of panties and the slit in my skirt, I let him play fairly freely and he kept his decorum, mostly. At least that went as planned. We finished a bottle of chardonnay together and had desert. I’m not a drinker, and chardonnay has one of the highest alcohol volumes for wine. And the waiter kept coming over and filling up my glass while I was looking at sparky, who was driving, so smartly drank less. By the time we walked the short distance up another hill to the car, I was drunkity-drunk -drunk.
Pass the Advil
I don’t hit people when I’m drunk. I don’t put them in cages, or step on them or hurt their balls or go anywhere near dominating acts like humiliation. Or, get on my six and a half inch high heel boots and wield anything, even just to ride someone. All of which were part of my so called plan. But I do get horny as hell. So while driving home I scooted next to sparky, didn’t bother to adjust my wrap skirt which had slid open, grabbed his hand and put it on my thigh just almost grazing my labia, and sat back and enjoyed the ride. It worked. I waited till we were off the highway to reach over and run my nails over his hard cock through his jeans, and played with his cock for the last mile or two to my house. I’ll have to remember how well this worked because WOW did I get a fucking. An advil in the morning and apologize to the neighbors kind of fucking.
So, spark?
Clearly, sparky and I are getting along famously. But do I feel …’it’? No. But do I feel spark? Well, I don’t know. Maybe. I did find myself thinking of someone else several times. Several times. And kicking myself in the ass for it the whole time. I was impressed. I started the day thinking for sure this guy had half planned a possibly bad date that would fall apart, and as it turns out I was the bad date that fell apart, and he made me feel like a queen anyway. He was thoughtful, anticipated my desires very well considering we’ve been on a total of 8 dates together, and I enjoyed seeing him finally relax and be himself a bit more. He brought flowers. The ballet…on his own. Not a word about my being a disaster, or not getting spanked, but that may be because of the dress and the panties and the fact that I did manage to terrorize his nipples, at least. And then there’s the cervix pounding. I think if I don’t look hard for that spark and put some kindling on it, fan it a bit, I’m probably pretty dumb.
What’s the fastest way to get a new flogger?
By using something stingy very well, on a sub who likes something thuddy instead. Like sparky here, who mentioned that he’d have to find me a nice flogger pretty quickly when I told him this was just me warming up.
We had a nice date Sunday. He invited me to his home in the hill country. It had a great view, but lots of windows without coverings, which hampered my plans a bit- but not too much.
We enjoyed the sunset on his balcony over some beers, with cheese and sausage. He was adorably nervous, flitting around to get my chair, light my smoke, and keep the counter clean; and had laid out one place setting, remembering what I’d had planned for our date before. Once the sun set, he made some rice, put the shishkabobs that had been marinating on the counter on the grill, and steamed some apsaragus- a lovely meal.
I wasn’t in the mood to be served, or to try and figure out how to have him serve me naked without giving the neighborhood a good show; so I asked him to eat with me. This flustered him a bit, he had clearly anticipated a different plan; I enjoy keeping him off guard. We talked about his trip, various things going on with each of us. I enjoyed his rapt attention as he waited for some sign that I was ready to, as his email earlier that day had said “do evil things” to him.
We went downstairs and kissed on the couch. Kissing lessons, definitely next on the list. In a few short minutes he was panting, and I told him I wanted him to go to his room and strip naked for me, while I went out to my car. I told him I’d need about 3 minutes, and to meet me on his knees. I went to the bathroom to change; I’d brought a corset-it was too hot to wear during the afternoon- we reached almost 80 degrees (whoohoo!), and worn my rhinestone lead/belt. I put on a pair of open crotch lace panties that tie shut at just the right spot, and the corset and belt; but the piece de resistance was the umm..FABULOUS shoes I found that match the belt. I had planned to wear my boots but they don’t fit well into my overnight bag, and these shoes needed to be shown off.
I met sparky in the bedroom, he was waiting on his knees like a good boy. I sat on the edge of the bed and had him face me and scoot closer. We kissed for several minutes, and then he went to the floor and worshipped my feet without being told. As he kissed and licked one, I used the other foot to graze his hard cock and dig my heel into his tender thigh, working from the outside, in, and up towards his crotch. He pretended not to be worried how far up I’d go. I enjoyed his hot tongue and the contrast with the cold metal chains on the shoes; let him lick each one as I leaned back on my elbows to watch and then directed him to lick the sensitive spots behind my knees and the back of my thighs.
Once he’d worked over both feet and thighs I sat up and told him I wanted him to jack off for me. He blushed about 14 shades of red, but complied. I had him tell me about all the naughty things he’d thought about me while he was out of town this last month, stopping him occasionally to slow his pace. I scooted to the edge of the bed until the tip of his cock grazed my clit as he stroked it. That almost sent him over the edge, and I let him enter me after not too long. He came quickly, and I pushed him to the bed to straddle his face for my own orgasm. He didn’t hesitate to taste his own cum, and didn’t pause as I turned around so that I could put my red collar on his flacid cock. After I came, I took off the belt and clipped it to the cock collar, tugging and playing with it for a while, teasing sparky about his teeny tiny balls. Then I took out the short lead with the clip, and clipped him to my shoes. We made a short tour around the bedroom; but not far- the rest of his house is uneven limestone flooring and I didn’t feel quite that mean yet. **edit- addition because I forgot in my excitement about the cropping** Then I took him back to the bed where he laid and I sat next to him, crossed legged, while we talked and I took out my box of tiny clothespins. I had tried one of the smallest on his nipple a few weeks ago, not quite letting go of it all the way before he squealed, and we weren’t the only ones in the house, so I’d had to stop. This time I started with the larger, two inch ones, using a few on his nipples and balls, and the skin around his inner thigh. I alternated, one, then two on his nipples, taking one off after a minute or two and putting it on his scrotum while stroking his hair. I only put 5 on at once, briefly- because I wanted the conversation to continue and sparky was squirming and holding his breath.**
I took him back to the bed and had him kneel over the end for a spanking session. I warmed him up with my hand for a few minutes. He had told me he preferred thuddy to stingy things, so I used my ‘earth medics self massager’ next for a few minutes- it’s a scary looking thing I’ll just have to take a picture of instead of describing. I accidentally left it at sparky’s, so for now picture a wood handle with a long flat metal shaft about an inch wide, with a round attachment at the end that looks like a hairbrush on one side and a bumpy ball on the other. It’s what left the little pinprick dots. I waited until his skin was pink and slightly warm, and he was breathing heavily before getting out my new crop. I sat beside him and tapped lightly across both cheeks, watching carefully as he tensed under a stroke and then relaxed. I alternated about 5 or 6 light smacks with one or two hard strokes, caressing the crop loop across his sweet spot and up and down his ass crack lightly between, drawing goose bumps before smacking him again. It was hard to hold back as he drew in his breath on the hard ones and I slowly ran my fingers over the hot welps; I wanted to just keep going.
His whimpers and the stripes rising on his ass made me want to swing the crop hard enough to whir in the air, but sparky’s not a pain puppy, and just not ready for that. I worked him up to three good ones like that and wondered if he’d holler out “Red”. (I use the red/yellow/green safety word system). He didn’t but I felt we’d reached a good limit for our first beating, and knelt behind him, pulling on the short lead I’d unhooked that was left dangling between his legs and caressing his balls, kissing and then blowing cool breath on his stripes. I caressed him like this for several minutes, probing his tight asshole. I asked if he’d found his training plug like I asked, and he admitted that while he had, he hadn’t put it to any use yet, as I could clearly see. It was getting late and he’d performed very well, so I climbed up onto the bed next to him and caressed his back, and asked if he’d like to be rewarded by being shown off on my lead like a good boy. He flipped over quickly and clipped the lead back to shoe himself, so I took that as a yes, pushed his legs apart with my heel, and snapped a picture. Yesterday he told me it was a little humiliating to think about me showing the pictures to my friends, like a fisherman with a prize catch, and he’s the fish. I agreed with the simile, amuzed.
…Aren’t those shoes fucking fabulous?
Cuckold Shoe Shopping Part II- the Conclusion
Click here to be taken to the conclusion of Cuckold Shoe Shopping.
Sorry it took a day longer than I thought, but I was busy enjoying actual fun.
And, if you read it right after I posted, I accidentally deleted the first sentence and screwed up the anchor. It’s there now.